Sunday

I Saw a Unicorn, What Do I Do?

STEP ONE

  1. Run!
  2. Still alive? Great! Now, run faster.
  3. I guess you ran pretty fast. After all, you survived long enough to check out this website.
  4. You're sure it's not still around, right? Stay low and away from windows.

STEP TWO

  1. Now it's time to figure out what kind of unicorn you saw.
  2. And maybe call the police.
  3. Or Gordian Pharmaceuticals Corp. They are always looking for a new unicorn.
  4. You're positive it's not around still, right? Listen for growling. Maybe throw a steak into the yard and see what happens.

STEP THREE
  1. To be perfectly honest, you shouldn't have survived that.
  2. The survival rate of a unicorn sighting is in the low teens.
  3. Are you sure you're not a unicorn hunter?

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